Next three questions are used to gain a more complete sense of character and personality of applicant. As with other questions, they’re primarily used as conversation starters during interview. We also use questionnaire internally so employees are familiar with our cultural sensibilities and how the twisted, lunatic owner thinks, operates.
Why are your friends boring?
a) They’re not boring. They’re a lot of fun.
b) They never want to try anything new. They talk about and do the same things over and over again. They’re really conventional.
c) I don’t know.
Just trying to get a sense how changeable and adaptable one is. We’re wondering if those who pick B would have an easier time adapting to our work culture (assuming they’ve been working and living in completely different culture). Those who pick A may be more likely to be firmly entrenched in a set of standards and values, and if those standards and values are radically different from ours, they may have trouble adapting.
Most picked A. A few picked B or C.
How many years should you spend in jail?
c) more than 6
Everyone picked A. Which is disturbing because it means applicants are either dull or sociopaths who by definition have no sense of guilt, shame, remorse, original sin. We don’t want to work with Jesus. We just want to work for Jesus.
What is the middle-aged guy w/moustache driving a Corvette having for dinner Thursday evening?
a) Store bought lemon meringue pie over kitchen sink
b) Organic quinoa-kale salad and Perrier at Putain de Merde
c) Medium well steak and dressed baked potato at Outback Steakhouse
Should probably get rid of this question because we never have time to talk about it during the interview. Point of the question is to get a sense of respondent observation skills, life experiences (exposure to different standards and values) and how they categorize people and styles. Most picked C. A few picked A. Even fewer picked B. I can imagine A and C. Corvettes tend to be coveted by those who start with a Camaro then upgrade to Mustang. It’s a blue collar car.