The Soup *Blank* Kitchen FAQs

Why did you take off the “word” Nazi?
The sign was putting neighbors in danger — there was a drive by shooting and graffiti last night — and we don’t need police officers getting hurt if a mob shows up. I feel bad about inconveniencing people and grateful that my neighbors are so patient with me. (Oh the perils of letting Andrew be Andrew).

What’s the new name going to be?
I don’t know? A customer had an excellent suggestion: Alive Soups. Leaning toward that, as it differentiates and links brands. Still tempted to experiment with, just to see how differently people would react:

  • Soup Lenin Kitchen
  • Soup Mao Kitchen
  • Soup British Kitchen
  • Soup Korean Kitchen

Would there be double standards? Probably. I mean, I consider the Brits the most murderous and racist empire — colonialism was justified by racism — of the past two centuries. How problematic would Korean xenophobia be? Point is, if we go by a single standard, there wouldn’t be many words left to choose from. Every regime has blood on its hands, every person has sinned, and all words can be interpreted as diabolical.

Why didn’t you stick with the original name and debate the triggered?
People rarely want to debate, it’s usually a waste of time.

Do you get triggered by words and images?
I don’t know. I watched a BBC piece on China the other day and their coverage, which I found unfair, and it made me angry and frustrated. So I feel emotions. But is that the same as being triggered? I’m not sure what triggered means.

Is the censorship going to get worse?
I don’t think so, trends run in cycles. And Bill Mayer, a liberal, is starting to push back at the cancel culture movement.

Will the controversy generate more business?
Everyone in Everett knows who I am now but don’t know if it’ll generate more or less business.

Was it worth it?
I don’t know.

27 thoughts on “The Soup *Blank* Kitchen FAQs

  1. HumminAlong

    I would laugh at how much of an idiot you are if it weren’t so sad how much of a self centered, myopic asshole you’ve been. I hope someone starts a business next to yours named “Christians Are Hypocrite, Queer, Baby Eaters Who Got Scammed By Political Grifters” and they sell bible themed caviar, veal, and kobe beef. Its all fun and games until someone is an asshole to the way you view the world. Shithead.

  2. Libtard

    It’s not just the name. This edgy fight against cancel culture is awful, your encouragement of ogling your servers is infantile. You say “shocking” things in an attempt to stir debate, but it’s clear to see you are merely going for attention. People that will support you are Nazi sympathizers and others on the right who exist to “own the libs”. Perhaps you should fuck off instead of trying to expose the hypocrisy of others by using other dog whistle names. You are the stereotypical “intellectual” to stupid to recognize their own need for attention and validation.

  3. s

    The problem with your senseless provocation is an utter lack of substance. You essentially admit to being an edgelord for attention. There is no worthwhile content or meaning to your actions. You are allowed to spew vacuous nonsense in the guise of some kind of ‘social experiment,’ but don’t be surprised when people with brains tell you that your behavior is pathetic.

  4. Rachelle DeBelle

    I’ve seen more productive interviews come from me talking to my dog while he sits in the his own yard. The irony in the relativity between the two is truly something. What a DOUCHE.

  5. Susan bukony

    M W.
    M W.
    Groton, MA
    0 friends
    5 reviews
    1 photo
    2.0 star rating 2/18/2015
    I was excited to find a juice and smoothie bar up near Lynnwood that uses fresh produce. Was planning on coming every day: 2 juices @ 8.00 = 240.00 a month more or less. Not clearly organic but whatever. First trip in was great and helpful. Second trip in: egotistical Chinese high strung owner is working. Tells me to shout my order while he is running between sink, back room, cleaning and preparing food. No sanitary gloves on. I was hoping to make a green juice a little less bitter and asked to add banana. The counter help says sure they will run it through the blender. High strung chinese guy intercepts stating it will cause big problems with the workflow. Very rude about it. Guess what: Had you asked nicely, what I wanted before just being so uninterested and self absorbed, I Would have gladly taken a suggestion on another way to adjust the juice. You know, customer service? Also what workflow. You get one customer at a time dude. And you are running around like a maniac looking anything but in control of yourself. Bad vibes for juice. Get over yourself. And try cleaning the place and following health dept practices such as if your hands are in the dirty sink, wear gloves before you start picking and shredding your cooked chicken. Jerk.
    Report review
    Mollie M.
    Comment from Mollie M. of Alive Juice Bar
    Business Customer Service
    2/21/2015 2 juices @ 8.00 = 240.00 a month. Doing what it takes to ensure a racist Pain in the Ass Customer never returns = Priceless. BTW, you forgot to mention that your drink tastes like Chinese jizz. Ching Chong! Read less

      1. Go Fuc Yaself

        lol, Andrew, you have got to be one of the most clueless people I’ve ever read about. So, it’s “cancel culture” and censorship to take issue with the Soup Nazi name, but “racist” to call a Chinese guy Chinese. Speaking of cancel culture, a customer calls you Chinese and you write that you do everything you can to make sure she “never returns” again. So apparently, unless Andrew agrees with you, he’s going to do everything he can to keep you out of his “safe space”…..I mean, store. Triggered much?

      2. Alive Juice Bar

        Customer was ejected for insisting on unreasonable request. Then we trolled her by calling her a racist (which she is, like everyone else), which I couldn’t care less about. We serve racists all the time, didn’t you hear?

        Do I decide what you get to jerk off to at your own home? No, that’s your space. And I have my space, which you don’t have to go to or like. It’s that simple, let people make their own decisions. Your rules in your home, my rules in mine.

      3. This guy is fucking clueless

        Right. You have your own safe space. You’re easily triggered and so you pay rent for a space so that you don’t have to engage anyone you don’t like. I totally get it. You sound like a real champion of free speech and totally self-aware.

      4. Andrew is Easily Triggered

        So, Andrew’s parting thought is “Safe space for me, but none for thee.” Lol.

  6. Ilikeass

    How about china man kitchen, with winnie the pooh as the logo. That’s the most racist country and xenophobic in the world.

    1. Alive Juice Bar

      I disagree, China is a multiethnic nation that celebrates its multicultural heritage. Korea is homogeneous, could that be why they’re xenophobic and racist, by American standards? I don’t know. Can’t do Chinaman kitchen cause soups are all sorts. Some Chinese style soups but mostly American.

      1. You Suckee Longtime

        I lived there bro. I’m very familiar China. What’s really funny is that a guy who claims “no one wants to debate” resorts to Youtube videos to make his arguments. That University of Chicago degree was money well spent.

      2. RJ

        I’m not sure you know what “multiethnic” or “multicultural” mean. China is 90+% Han Chinese. Even today, they ship Han Chinese to Tibet to colonize it. And if you’re a Uighur, forget about it. If you survive the concentration camps and forced sterilization, then you’ll receive a lovely trip to a remote desert where you will toil till you die. How you can complain about “cancel culture” while supporting a country where being different can get you killed is the height of hypocrisy.

      3. Alive Juice Bar

        Yes, China is 90 percent Han. But it recognizes, what, 56 ethnic groups and doesn’t have a policy of cultural assimilation. In fact, minorities were exempt from one child policy rules and could get into higher education with lower scores. I agree with you about Tibet, not about Uighur situation. Not worth arguing about, we trust different media sources, that’s all. As for supporting China, (and the US, for that matter), it’s like supporting your parents even if they’re far from perfect. Don’t know what that has to do with cancel culture, which was played out during the Chinese Cultural Revolution, with disastrous results.

      4. lol

        Claiming China is multiethnic because it reports to have 56 minority groups is like saying I can’t be racist because I’ve got a Black friend. I’m pretty sure when you’ve engaged in a policy of diluting the native population by bringing in your people (ie colonization), sterilizing ethnic minorities, and imprisoning them, you’ve abandoned any claim to valuing diversity.

        As for cancel culture, you can still be imprisoned or killed for unpopular/unacceptable ideas in China. I’d say that’s cancel culture on steroids. It’s ironic that you play the victim in America, while supporting and endorsing the Chinese government. Apparently, your “principles” only extend as far as your fingertips.

  7. Mike Rawtch

    “Point is, if we go by a single standard, there wouldn’t be many words left to choose from. Every regime has blood on its hands, every person has sinned, and all words can be interpreted as diabolical.”

    This is such cringe.

    The best part is how you are 100% the kind of person who rants about PoStMoDeRn NeO-mArXiSm but also you’re low key a post modernist. Post modernism at its core is the view that no single truth exists, that truth is just one narrative among many.

  8. Harry Angstrom

    Your flippant, cynical attempt to make a grubby dollar and attract unearned attention to yourself by tying your business name to a fascistic regime responsible for the illegal imprisonment, torture, and murder of over six million human beings is repugnant and appalling. Grow up, asshole, and then fuck all the way off.

  9. Andrew Ho is a FRAUD

    You pretend to be part of the intelligentsia, but you’re an uneducated prick hiding behind big words. Nationalism is not a reasonable response to globalism, and if you did ANY historical research at all you’d know how dangerous it is. Fuck your troll antics, sell soup or shut up.

  10. Andrew Slurpee Long Time

    I don’t get it. Andrew says he can’t debate the “triggered” because they don’t want to debate, so I try to debate him. I get Andrew to admit that his business is nothing more than his own personal safe space. I note in our debate about China that he’s a huge hypocrite for complaining about cancel culture while supporting the Chinese government. He posts Youtube video to support his position. I tell him that if he needs Youtube videos to make his arguments for him, then his U of Chicago degree was money well wasted. Then Andrew stops responding or approving my comments (censorship?).
    I think it was my “suckee long time” joke. I think it triggered him. Yet, we Americans have laughed and enjoyed me suckee long time jokes for decades. I mean, at least as long as the Soup Nazi Seinfeld episode. I don’t get why me suckee long time jokes would offend Andrew, when he’s clearly so hip and cool and unwoke so as to name his restaurant Soup Nazi. In fact, it would be a great name for his restaurant. “Me slurpee long time” You know, like slurp soup. Come on, Andrew, you slurpee long time. You could probably franchise it, and it is far more original than a stolen Seinfeld joke from thirty years ago. Now let’s just see how unwoke Andrew is….


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